We all get stuck. Stuck in our same old thinking habits. Stuck in the face of new challenges. Stuck in our unhelpful thoughts that hold us back. Stuck with emotions that swirl around in our minds with nowhere to go.
I’ve recently been stuck on a few things. They’ve caused me to feel knotted, frustrated, unbalanced, distracted, a whole number of emotions mixed up around things like my balance of family and work, the direction I want to take my business next, and a few other bits and pieces.
During this time I joined a peer-to-peer coaching circle with the ICF. It’s a CPD approach for Professional Coaches – I coach someone and someone else coaches me. Through this I gain the chance to learn from another coach’s approach, practice your own skills, gather feedback on my approach, as well as getting some quality coaching support at the same time. I’m really enjoying broadening my horizons and being challenged by seeing the coaching world from others’ perspectives.
And what I’ve noticed, and had forgotten for myself, was the power of speaking your emotions. Or writing them down – ideally with paper and pen – there’s something very different about the tangible aspect of a real piece of paper and writing implement.
Just the act of speaking an emotion helps it to lose its power over you.
Somehow by saying it out loud, you’re acknowledging and accepting the situation for what it is, and rather than berate ourselves for ‘being so stupid’ for feeling that way, by accepting that it is just what it is, then we can move forward.
This reflects a belief in Gestalt Theory where we must first accept ourselves for where we are and for who we really are, in our entirety – flaws and all – and without judgement of those flaws, before we can move to where we want to be.
This is what I’ve experienced recently and, if you’re in a stuck place, I hope sharing this could help you move somewhere else. So, pen and paper at the ready, or find somewhere you can talk to yourself, or even better ask someone else to take you through these questions….
What are you stuck on?
What feelings are you experiencing about that thing?
Say those feelings out loud, or write them down. A few times if you need to.
And as the words lose their power, help yourself to move forward – So if this is where you are right now, where do you want to be instead?
I wish you well in moving to somewhere more helpful.
[Photo credit – http://amandacarroll.org/prayer-to-get-un-stuck-2/]